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In this Close Reading series, biblical scholars reflect on a passage in their area of expertise that has been formational in their own discipleship and continues to speak to them today.
In Paul’s second canonical letter to the Corinthians, he hears the Lord say, “My grace is sufficient for you” (2 Cor. 12:9). For the first years after I made a profession of faith in Christ, these words brought me incredible comfort. At first, I interpreted them in terms of my own sins and shortcomings: When I was rude to my parents or gossiped about a friend, his grace was sufficient.
Later, I interpreted these words in terms of hardship or difficulty, like when I had knee injuries that ended my ability to run and play soccer and touch football—and so many other things that I enjoyed doing with my family and friends. Through those challenges and whatever other instability that I was experiencing, the graciousness of God was a strong thread. He truly was my ever-present help.
But one day, I found that things were different. During a season of prolonged chronic pain and illness, these words that had offered me balm morphed into a crushing stone, a suffocating weight that I couldn’t throw off or pretend didn’t exist. In church, all my friends stood with hands raised in rapturous joy, and everyone but me belted out the refrain to a popular worship song: “Your grace is enough.” I sat in my chair, overcome by alternating waves of despair and rage. Joyful, healthy people surrounded me, singing. In a crowd of passion, I was alone.
When I heard some form of those words, I always found myself wondering, Your grace is sufficient? Sufficient for what, exactly? Questions like these consumed me.
It wasn’t that I no longer trusted in God or that salvation would come eventually. It also wasn’t that I no longer trusted God would heal and help those around me. I truly believed that God graciously answered prayers. But after a decade of pain, fatigue, ...